July 14, 2013


Another year has gone by.  The pain lessens slightly with time, but always remains.  Driving past the spot where he was stabbed in Carbondale is unavoidable and always difficult.  Seeing the places he worked and places I drove him to many times conjures memories that cannot be erased.

When I'm driving alone, I look at the empty passenger seat in my van where he sat on our many short trips.  It brings tears to my eyes thinking about all the times we engaged in long conversations and trivia games while on the road. Remembering statements he made while riding in that seat still tugs at my heart strings.

"Mom, I hope I look as good as you and Dad do when I get to be your age."

"I want to take care of you when you get old."

"What are your favorite flowers, Mom?  I want to get you some when I get the money."

Ryan's daughter Hannah is growing into a sweet young lady.  She has the wisdom and thinking processes that sometimes make me forget she is only 9 years old.  She is also still very creative, something that of course reminds me of her father.  She has a 2 year old little brother now, Wyatt, that she loves dearly and tries to help watch as he is very active and a typical explorative toddler.

This week we made a Facebook page for Ryan to share information about his life and his death.  If you are on Facebook and would like to visit the page, here is the link.

https://www.facebook.com/rememberryan83

The police are still lacking the forensic evidence they need to prosecute Ryan's attackers.  I keep hoping that evidence will magically appear, but my hopes continue to fade with time.   If you know anything that will help with Ryan's case, we are begging you to come forward.