Ryan's 34th birthday was October 29th, yet another birthday he wasn't allowed to celebrate because his life was stolen from him.

At this point I am disappointed that some of those who really knew what happened that night have not come forward.  Those of you who are guilty of his murder or of covering up the crime better know that I will not stop looking for the truth until my dying day.  If you did it, stop being a coward and confess.  If you know who did it, why, and have not given that information to me or the police, do the right thing and give Ryan the justice he deserves.  

On the way home this morning, the song that Ryan and I discussed and that he liked so much came on the radio, as it has so many other times when I was thinking of him while on the road.  He was a good soul and wanted to "settle down" like the song says...

I struggle with knowing what to say today.  11 years of pain for all of us. 11 years of visiting Ryan's grave and still no one has been arrested for his murder. 11 years of Hannah not knowing her father.  11 years of his attackers enjoying their lives after robbing Ryan of his. 11 years of feeling like I have been fighting for Ryan with little or no help from anyone.  

I miss Ryan's smile.  I miss his humor.  I miss his voice.  I still can't look at his photos without crying.  I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone.  

I am thankful for those who have come forward with information over the years about his murder.  So far sadly we haven't obtained what we need to get convictions but if the lowlifes who killed Ryan or anyone protecting them think for a second that I am going to give up and go away, they have another thing coming.  

I will always fight for my son.  

I'm not going away until they are put away.